Deciding not to decide..

All our lives we have so many people telling us what to do . Sometimes you listen and sometimes you don't . That's natural . But those times when you just want to listen to your heart and the ones you love are pushing you the other way then what to do ? The point where you decide what to do and how to do it that's what a decision really is . 

Sadly one reality we have to face is that we have to live with our decisions . But is that actually the sad part ? Facing the music , the ball is in your court , you got what you bargained for , I told you so , so on and so forth . We have a couple hundreds of these babies crawling in our minds . But the issue isn't the final say , or how much you took into consideration others feelings or did you listen to your heart or not. It all comes down to the point where everyone and I mean EVERYONE is the audience waiting for your life to turn into a freak show . That's sad and pathetic .. but that's what happens. 

Living with your decisions in life can turn out to be the hardest sometimes .. even maybe every time. But is that supposed to mean that we shouldn't have a say in anything ?We should let the elders say .. let their wisdom shine upon us dumb and poor souls who are considered "immature" and "lacking responsibility" ? 

We all do things in life that we regret , or that we wish we could've done differently to avoid hurting others. But we cant .. that doesn't mean that we should be stripped off the basic respect in life , or that we should be used as a bad example for everyone around us. 

Making a wrong decision or just a difficult decision or a decision that you cant tell the outcome of in the next 5 years doesn't always have to be frowned upon . I mean come on guys its not like you've killed or raped somebody .. its just that you listened to your heart for once . 

Its hell to wake up every morning thinking what turn your life is gonna take because of your choices... its hell to go through the day... even passing a second with those invisible eyes of the world on you waiting for you to screw it all up .. bidding their time to laugh at you and to mock you and to roll you deeper into the dirt. 

But here's the thing .. they can roll you and turn you into a pig or cow or dog but one thing they cant do is make you beg and cry and regret those decisions .. and they certainly cant break you . 

So get up ,dress up and show up , 'cause the show must go on . 

Cheerio :)

Clear rejection ...Fake promises ?

Yayyy the holidays are finally here . I feel like a complete stranger writing after such a long time ! Things have changed .. obviously not according to my tastes. But atleast I have a longgggg list of people and things to bitch about :) 

To think of it , feel I named my blog a litttttllleeee sweet :p but  I guess dissing people around me and hating them is equivalent to a hug in my world :p sweeter even (sorry if someones feelings got hurt little cry baby!). Everyone in my year is going mad with all these internship applications .. since they wanna be the next Bill Gates or Mr. Ikea or whatever ! Funny thing is that the people who promised me that they would get me a spot through some "relative" of theirs using the whole casting couch technique , bailed out :p BIG WOW that turned out to be . funnily I expected this from them .. actually I wouldn't be surprised if anyone in my class would turn out like this . Nowadays people tend to shock you more by being nice than they would hurt you by being mean and selfish . 

its the way of the world I guess . Maybe a survival mechanism for them . But that just me giving jackasses all over this world the benefit of doubt . The reality is something completely different my dears. Its not a simple case of being selfish . OH NOOOO ... its the game of egos .. the race to who can be the bigger bitch .. like an Olympic triathlon in which you have to be selfish , be cut throat and  have a god-complex about your abilities (god-complex for those of us who don't know means to think of your abilities as second to none ..basically living under the illusion that your better than others lollllll) .

Friends (or whatever they deserve to be called after showing their true colors) are the same . You stay with them for 4 or even more years and in the end they ditch you because well they think that just because you are well off you have a 60K salary booked just for doing nothing . Funny how minds work and how people are threatened by what your social standing has to offer around here . I sometimes wonder that is it fair to the so called "rich" kids to be thought of that way ? Maybe they lack alot of things we cant see . But as they say "jithey di khoti utay aan khaloti" meaning that even if someone as stupidly impulsive as me would try to make people realize how wrong it is that "hey dude you call him your friend" .. that 'rich' kid will still settle for getting kicked my those morons he would call friends. He would still look for their opinion and rather be with them than getting himself respected and getting the loyalty he actually deserves. 

Well Not like this will make difference to anyone at all . The question is .. who is wrong ? the one doing wrong or the one being wronged !

And more importantly ... which one are we ?

Cheerio :)

Reverence .

Some words have become such fossil-like around us that we know they exist but then again so did the dinosaurs and dodo birds. We are blessed with many such fossils ..one such is maybe respect. sounds so strong and out there and OMG type . you say it and instantly everyone imagines someone like Morgan Freeman or some James bond walking into a room . But then again we all love our fantasies and I , more than anyone , am too dreamy about even the smallest of things. 

So back to where I was .. respect has such low occurrence nowadays . Or maybe it was always like this in every century and time. anything which can give people their own space , Honor and be considerate about their opinions , basically just being reminded of the fact that every body is AT LEAST still a human no matter what else flaws they have ... all of this has gone to the dogs. I've seen maybe one trait in some people but mostly all of us have that empty space where these three things should be. 

Now you'd respect your mom and dad and maybe your siblings but that same scenario and put some stranger into it , like a friend or a colleague or anyone you know not too well . BOOM the person you were at home just left the building baby. We are someone mean , or obnoxious. We just don't have the decency to be polite. When we are small we are taught how to respect elders be it anyone even the meanest person you know . But what do we do ? we humiliate them , try to show them that your so above them and they are so down on the floor . 

That's the main problem , we want people to bow down to us . We want them to wail and cry and beg at our feet . We want to be gods for them . We want importance , consideration and emotional ego pleasing lives from the ones around us be it our family or Friends or anyone that we are ready to do anything . All these things that we want ... well honey they all sum up into one word and that is respect . Its Honor . Its some self esteem we need to see reflected in the eyes of those who are in front of us . But sadly we don't get it . Alot of people give it but the taking end is empty and will remain empty probably even after their deaths . 

I guess that's life .. but I think we need to start earning respect by giving it . By not judging on someones history. By just trying to think or put ourselves there. that is the simplest of ways . If only we had the sense to actually implement it . Instead we choose to suffer and face humiliation because of the degradation we have given ourselves to people. 

Cheerio :)

An ode to all the boys .

My friend has a friend who has a friend who giving weird green signals to another friend of mine ... juts to get herself some male attention I guess :p Or whatever the reason is I don't care . But I kinda actually do 'cause my friend who is the victim hasn't realised he's the victim here :p He is thinking he's the hero who finally got the girl who thinks shes the so cool amazingly pretty cheerleader type .
Funny thing is that this is the story of alot of boys and girls . They think they finally find the perfect one only to realise that the magical connection just existed in your head .. In reality its a feed their ego connection :p meaning all the loving on one side goes to the other side to become ego fodder :p . Love is the most wonderful feeling in this world wowww yipeee eeeeee :p yeah sure it is !!! We need to identify love before we can claim to be in it . That's the glitch anyways. Reading about people we spend our days with the most . We act so wise but when it comes to too close a relationship like family or friends we are the stupidest people . I think we're little over dumb actually :p Girls are using you young man left right and centre . And you think its all good . Or you act all too clever and trust me beta your really making a fool of yourself . Your the only one who cant feel it but all my dear guy Friends we can literally touch the foolishness and dumbness :p

So don't fall prey to those opportunist girls trust me they get meaner than the 'acclaimed' playboys and they will throw you in a corner even you cant find .
This was just a friendly note for the "cool" boys and even for the ones who act all "we are not that type" , dude just don't see a girl and jump ...
Cheerio :)

Looky Looky

It's been such a long summer and I don't think i need to mention it was boiling hot too . My summer was exciting in good and bad ways . Fast forward it all and ow here I am stuck in my boring routine life with oodles of courses I ain't getting jack of.
The nicer part was I got holidays again in the last ten days of Ramadan . This post today would probably be all about me i guess . So I'm going to mope a little and complain a little and all this little is going to add up to be very big :p
So the other day I was just talking to a friend ( nothing special in that ) and I don't really know how the conversation really started but it ended up on one word "show off " . And obviously used in a very wrong manner . Which kind of created a rift too and killed the spirit of any conversation that would've been held following that :p
But I realised that around us we do alot of things that others perceive as us showing off to the world , or relatives or whoever the hell it is . This is because the level of superficiality has increased so much that we no longer stop to think for even a minute that maybe that person isn't  'flaunting' it,.... maybe its what they enjoy doing . By that I mean that we have stopped giving people a chance in life . We don't consider their perspective and we definitely take the first chance possible to jump in and criticise or accuse the person . Actually no That's what happened to me . I was offended as soon as it came out of my dear friends mouth . I've been kind of having conflicting thoughts about it too . I thought I'd confront . But then I thought it better to not . Because if the person didn't see it in me then they wouldn't see it now even .
So the easiest way was to mope it out here . But the moral of the story ... maybe we shouldn't tell people what we like to do in our free time , or where we enjoy spending our money , or if our tastes are may be a little over the top and expensive for their sensibilities.
(better one)Another moral  : Don't just come out with little name tags with "show-off" written on them .. or actually with any accusation at all on other people . Especially if you claim to know them or actually no "especially" cases ... just don't . Period .
Because honey they ain't labelling you . And trust me you should be scared if they do :p
Cheerio :)

Beauty ... and the beast .

Once upon a time there was a little girl with her little friends . They were all very happy .. no judging , no fights . Ego was like an invisilibilty cloak -non existant- and everyone was really happy .  
Then the wind blew and times changed . Some people turned out to be real humans , the others were just vessels for all sorts of animals . That little girl wasn't little anymore . She grew into a beautiful woman . I must mention here beautiful doesn't mean that the sun revolved around her and the moon shone with her flawless skin and perfect features . Oh no she was beautiful because she cared . Cared about people ,helped them , gave her friends advice that honestly helped them . Basically she had a soul .Something most of us are devoid of . 
The winds blew again but the times didn't change. The people did , the weather did and the situations did. But you see that is the thing . Time never changes its geography that brings the change , brings people closer or farther apart . It starts wars and ends them . Time is just a tool we can blame things on or be proud of when we see lives crumble. 
The girl ,  however she tried to be the same , didn't remain the same too . She became something we call 'angry' . Angry with her life ,  with her family or just with everything animated or inanimateness she started looking sort of ugly , beasty I guess.
This emotion was described  as a pressure cooker; we can only apply pressure against our anger for a certain amount of time until it explodes. 
 And one day that lovely girl exploded . I'm not sure if she felt better after that or not . If she died with that burst of emotions or if nothing happened at all and the days went past as usually .
But the villagers say that a lot of people were hurt . The close ones were seen in tears , some were caught guilty and some turned into horrible human beings, something they never were in the beginning . It was like a beast had entered town. Some of the people kept saying sorry , the girl said nothing to them but smiled a sad smile . Maybe some of those apologies were genuine , they actually did repent on the pain that the girl was feeling . But still the girl could've said nothing to anyone to make them better nor could others make her feel better and make her forget that outburst . 

No one was to be blamed here . No one ever can be blamed completely . These things happen . They happen on a minute to minute basis but we forget to take notice . An earthquake or deaths aren't the only tragedies . There is a tragedy greater than that and that is hurting people . And hurting yourself . So if people say they feel better after shouting then they are really big fat liars . I mean who feels better being a dog ? 
Yeah I thought so ... no one does . So next time you hurt people , or your blaming them or your just sick and bored of them for being in your life then leave them . And don't use them according to your moods and your free timings . If you don't want them now I doubt it you ever really wanted them in the first place . 
With your words or just basically your own insecurities you have no right to turn people into angry monsters . You have no right whatsoever to hurt them . And you definitely never had the right to say sorry . That is the biggest insult for anyone at all . Its like you killed someones mother dude!!!!
So to make this world a better place and not ruin the good qualities in those who you love because of these traits in the first place don't hurt them and don't be angry . Didn't work out well with the girl and it will never do much good to you too unless your a wannabe Hulk or Voldemort or all other things evil :P
Cheerio :)

Home is where the heart is .

A simple phrase ... but mostly under rated and completely cliched ... but then again cliches are cliches for a reason .

 I always have wondered why people say it .. mostly we just take the words all too literally . That , where ever we feel the most comfortable or perfectly fitted that's what a home is . In a way its true. But I - like always-  have my stupid-as-a-result-of-over-thinking take on it . 

Home , heart are so relative .To someone who moves houses and changes cities every 2-3 years they would certainly be very insensitive to the term . But I also think that people who have lived at the same place for their entire lives wouldn't know anything known as a 'non-home' environment. Wrong in both cases. Home isn't really a tangible word. It's not a building with four walls and a really soft bed. It isn't even a super luxurious area with a hugeeeeee LCD TV and an awesome sofa as a cherry on top .

 It's just the heart I guess . Its the place where our hearts beat ..actually where it's alive . 

Now , even that is such a relative phrase . If I'd talk about myself what would it mean ?? I'm not even sure myself I guess ... until I realise something is missing. Or some people are missing . Like I have everything but that one spark to set it all ablaze is what actually makes all the pieces come together. 

Home is a place that doesn't have to exist for people to see . Its untouchable and kind of even unfeelable by anyone but you... that's because it is YOUR home . Not someone Else's . Your happy place , with your person or persons , with your children , with the family you haven't met since you got married , with the loved one that you spend taking care off but see not much progress in recovery of , with your smile and with your laughter and tears mingled together.... where you don't really feel your missing out on something .Your finally not jealous of someone Else's life because you have the peace you've been searching for all your life . 

The travelling doesn't have to be physical , we don't have to travel the 7 continents , walks miles , or experience some big catastrophe to find love and peace . All we need is to look around .. use our senses ...may be home is the person talking to us , or the garden we sit in , or the family dinner we have , or basically anything at all that touches our deepest recesses , its just something that in the end finally makes misery a little or totally easy to bear . 

So if its the home your worried about .. then your worries end here . Don't earn money for a brick wall to be decorated with accessories and gadgets , or for a wooden floor , or for the latest car . Invest in smiles and people . Invest in that warmth that no one but you can feel .Invest in something like the mirror of Erised-only in this case it shows the real deal ... the background you never noticed because you were too busy looking at yourself and how your smile lacked that special thing . You don't look bad because your ugly or fat or poor or unhappy , its exactly as it should be , except that you forgot to adjust the lights behind you. 

Cheerio :)